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A new year, a new 6-track comedy/ukulele/punk E.P. Surely?
Happy fucking Christmas!
- Alfred Williams - The Queen’s Rap
- Uke’s Not Dead & Helen Arney - Just for Christmas
- Thomas Oliver Jones - Gabriel
- Sara Dennis & Gavin Wood - (Be Mine) This Christmas Time
- Ballard C. Boyd - The Firewood Song
- Lloyd Gabriel - Choking You
- Shiny and the Spoon - Buried
- Jane Cameron - Cold Dead Leaves
- Ryan Patterson - Stainless Steel Man
- Phredd - Merry Pirate Christmas
Uke Hunt Podcast
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Just lovely!
(Source: torgo10, via daveyxvx)
My new E.P, Bishops Itchington is now available to download! Give it a try! You’ll laugh! You’ll cry! You’ll most likely get quite aroused!
http://ukesnotdead.bandcamp.com
Uke’s Not Dead - “LIES!”
This is a message from your captain to all aboard this plane,
You put your trust in me, it’s only fair that I explain
The truth is I have really no idea how to fly,
But I need a Pilot’s income as a means of getting by
Cos times are hard, I’m struggling to make all my ends meet
I thought I’d get the hang of it by thirty thousand feet.
So I forged all my credentials and I wore a good disguise
and blagged the interview by telling lots and lots and lots and lots of…
LIES! LIES! Lies on my CV
All I got’s a lousy fucking media degree so I told
LIES! LIES! Lies on my CV.
Cos why on earth would anybody want to hire me?
It’s really quite a miracle I got us up this high.
But I can’t get us down again, so we’re all gonna die.
I know that my deception’s something you cannot excuse
But trust me, its my only way of getting interviews, cos
I tried creative language masking my ineptitude
with phrases like, “team player” and “a can-do attitude”
But constant failed attempts taught me its best to improvise
By fabricating my work history with rotten, dirty, stinking…
LIES! LIES! Lies on my CV
No one gives a monkey’s balls about my HND, so I told
LIES! LIES! Lies on my CV
Bullshit is the only way for me to be an employee.
I think it would be wise
If I were to devise
career plans that don’t involve me
falling from the skies
But all my previous tries
End in disappointed sighs
Cos the only skill I have is telling
Whopping, great, big, shameless, filthy
LIES! LIES! Lies on my CV
I should have got a job as a conservative MP and told some
LIES! LIES! Lies on my CV
I should get an honourary PHD in telling
LIES! LIES! Lies on my CV
I could justify one gap year, why the hell did I take 3? Let’s tell some
LIES! LIES! Lies on my CV
Help me, please, does anybody………… Want to hire me?
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